Franchise Marathon: Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (1985) and Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)

 * Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (1985)

* spoilers*

Tommy Jarvis has spent years in a mental institution dealing with the trauma of Jason Voorhees' murders. He finds himself transferred to Pinehurst Halfway House to live with more freedom among other troubled teens. They are hated by their neighbors, but Dr. Letter, the manager, seems to believe in rehabilitating his charges. One of the teens is murdered by another in a fit of rage, leading to more scrutiny and disapproval of the program. The murderer is arrested, but more murders follow with Jason's usual methods. 

A New Beginning starts out fresh with a different feeling from the other films. Troubled teens work and learn skills that will help them reacclimate to society. Sounds great until one of the charges kills another gruesomely and with no warning. That caught me completely off guard and I had no idea what to expect going forward. It felt a bit like Nightmare 3 with mismatched misfits that you can't help but like despite their flaws. They all suspect each other when the murders continue. Tommy is the unfortunate newcomer who hasn't had a chance to form attachments. He doesn't say much and continues his childhood love of monsters by creating his own incredibly detailed masks. I felt for him throughout the movie. 

I appreciate when a franchise tries to break away from its main character (like Halloween III), but it just doesn't work here. The rest of the movie after the initial kill is fairly familiar and formulaic. The ending isn't as fresh as its beginning and feels like a bad Scooby Doo episode with a tacked on ending, again making it seem like Tommy will hurt people. Perhaps it was an idea to have him continue as Jason, but it was obviously scrapped in the end. 

My rating: 2.5/5 fishmuffins

* Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)

Tommy Jarvis is back and recently released from a mental institution after he killed Jason years ago. He finds Jason's body and accidentally resurrects the body when trying to destroy it. Now, he's frantically trying to warn the former Camp Crystal Lake (now Camp Forest Green) residents about Jason, but Sheriff Mike Garris dismisses it as hallucinations from a disturbed mind. Only his daughter Megan believes Tommy and of course falls in love with him. As the body count rises, Garris blames Tommy and Jason is dismissed as an urban legend, leaving him free to slaughter.

Jason Lives is a fun installment to the Friday the 13th franchise. It has everything: super cheesy acting, a sappy love story (based on a very short, shallow relationship), and fun kills. Tommy Jarvis has turned into the Nancy Thompson of the franchise, hellbent on defeating Jason once and for all while no one believes him. The writers had to retcon the end of the last movie to get him there and I think it was a good decision.

Jason is explicitly supernatural for the first time, resurrected by electricity like Frankenstein's monster and trapped by his home soil like a vampire. It took a while, but this installment finally puts Jason in his own category instead of being a cheap copy of another slasher killer. It's so fun to watch him slice and dice through unsuspecting corporate workers and other bystanders. This is the first time we see the camp actually functional and Jason only kills counselors, not the children. Overall, Jason Lives is heavier on the comedy side and just fun to watch. 

My rating: 3.5/5 fishmuffins

Horror Movie Mini-Reviews: Blood and Black Lace (1964) and Magic (1978)

* Blood and Black Lace (1964)

Models in a fashion house are murdered by a masked assailant. Everyone involved is suspicious of each other, but all have secrets and ulterior motives. There are secret abortions, drug addictions, affairs, sex work, blackmails, and a growing stack of bodies. This is the first giallo film I've seen with an ensemble cast. No one person has more precendence than another. Each of their stories are woven together seamlessly. The cinematography supports the writing in this way with the camera tracking each main character through the dressing room of the fashion house. Everything just works together perfectly despite the many suspects and victims.

Much of the film feels like a thriller or murder mystery, but the aspects that take it to giallo are the color and composition of scenes as well as the kills. Each scene is so artfully directed and staged with pops of bright pink to contrast the dark colors. Even though the dubbed over dialogue can make the actors seem a bit stiff, the direction distracts from that a bit. The kills of mostly beautiful women are incredibly stylized and surprisingly brutal for the time with some biting commentary. The ending feels nihilistic rather than triumphant. Blood and Black Lace is an early giallo film that was a financial flop, but is cited as one of the first to create the formula. It's a beautiful watch, but not as developed or complex is later giallo films.

My rating: 3.5/5 fishmuffins

* Magic (1978)

Corky has been trying to break into the magic scene, but is continually frazzled by hecklers and bored audience members. He spices up his act with Fats, a ventriloquist dummy who irreverently makes fun of everyone with baudy jokes and biting commentary. His act catches the attention of  a TV station that wants to give him his own show, contingent on a psych evaluation Corky knows he will fail as Fats' persona threatens to take over. Corky then retreats to the Catskills to recoup only to run into his high school crush Peggy.

I hadn't heard of this film until it came up on Shudder and I don't know why people don't talk about it more. Anthony Hopkins takes on a dual performance of Corky and Fats. One is intorverted, unsure of himself, and bumbling while the other is confident but biting and cruel. As the film goes on, the Fats persona takes over Corky more and more until he's threatens to take over entirely. Hopkins embodies both personas convincingly. Corky is conflicted because he realizes that Fats is a problem, but Fats can also be his ticket to fame and fortune. Getting help or exposing the problem might dash his dreams forever, so he escapes to postpone the inevitable. It's a sad world we live in that he sees this as his only choice and it's even more impressive that it was made in the 70's.

The horror elements don't truly get rolling until the last third of the film, but establishing the background and dynamic of Corky and Fats is important to set up. Corky (through Fats) grows increasingly more deranged while he reconnects with his high school crush, giving rise to more drama as she's married with a jealous, borderline abusive husband. The ending has some unexpected twists and is completely worth your time. I would honestly love to see this remade because the themes are completely relevant to today.

My rating: 4/5 fishmuffins

Horror Movie Mini-Reviews: The Invisible Man (1933) and Vamps (2012)

* The Invisible Man (1933)

Dr. Jack Griffin stumbled upon a serum to make himself invisible, unaware of the toxins that are driving him insane. He goes to a remote town to figure out how to turn himself back, but he doesn’t get the privacy he needs. Flying into a rage, he terrorizes the town and plans to commit more murders and larger atrocious acts. Can his loved ones get him to listen and stop his reign of terror?

The Invisible Man is a late entry into the Universal Monsters and feels different than the previous entries due to the time period and the mood. It feels much more modern than its time and more malicious, on a larger scale than other Universal films. The special effects are impressive and revolutionary for the time. Jack is invisible for the entire film save for the last few minutes and it isn’t hidden. The technique looks like today’s green screen effects, but was achieved with a black velvet, a black velvet background, and a matte process.

Like almost all the others, the main character isn’t a flat villain, but the nice, normal person is never seen. All we see is the deranged doctor hellbent on creating as much death and chaos as possible. He gets worse as the film goes on, starting as generally ill tempered and rude and ending homicidal. His plans get larger and more elaborate, making him the most dangerous and mean spirited Universal monster. Trains The others focused on a small scale or didn’t even mean to inflict pain on others. They never went into full fledged terrorism, maliciously affecting anyone and everyone on a large scale like Jack. The Invisible Man is a wild ride for a Universal film and Claude Rains does an excellent job of embodying Jack's insanity without really being seen on screen.

My rating: 4/5 fishmuffins

* Vamps (2012)

Goody and Stacy are two vampires who found each other in New York City. Goody was turned into a vampire in 1841 by Ciccerus while Stacy was turned by the same person in the early 90's. Both view their transformations as a net good because Goody was able to advocate for important issues over the years and raise her family while Stacy was cured of her drug addiction. Neither vampire drinks human blood. Instead, they opt to drink animal blood, usually rats. The downside of their vampire state is being at the beck and call of their maker who has no problem drinking human blood and doesn't care about leaving huge massacre tableaux around. Vampire hunters set their sights on Goody and Stacy when Stacy dates Van Helsing's son. Can they convince the humans that they hold no threat and destroy their maker before more innocent vampires are killed?

Vamps is a goofy, adorable horror comedy that puts female friendship and romance before any horror elements. Stacy is just starting out as vampire while Goody has seen over 200 years of human history. Goody lies about her age and claims to know so much about history from The History Channel. She is tired of trying to keep up with technology and fashion trends in addition to looking for love every night in clubs and bars. Her nostalgia for the past and her views on activism give the film a bit more meat and dimension. Goody is shown in many different stages of her life and when she looks at part sof Manhattan, she sees and muses about what used to be there. Stacy finds love in Joey Van Helsing and struggles to prove to his family that not all vampires are evil. The conflict comes from two sides: the Van Helsing patriarch trying to eradicate all vampires and Ciccerus killing people left and right and putting the other vampires in danger.

Where the film falls flat is in the over the top goofy elements and the poor writing. The makeup for every vampire except Goody and Stacy is downright ghoulish with white cake makeup and dark circles around the eyes. The vampire effects beyond the fangs are cartoonish digital effects. The writing is servicable for the most part, but Sigourney Weaver is absolutely wasted as Ciccerus. She isn't able to be completely evil and ends up being childish and more whiny than sinister. Other than that, Vamps is a heartwarming horror comedy that's worth a watch.

My rating: 3/5 fishmuffins 

Horror Movie Mini-Reviews: The Houses October Built 2 and Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers

* The Houses October Built 2

The gang is back and infamous on the internet. Brandy, widely known as Coffin Girl, refuses to go to any more haunts after the Blue Skeleton incident. Jeff, Mikey, Bobby, and Zack want to ride out their wave of fame and continue their haunt tour across the US, but they would earn much more money with Coffin Girl in attendance. They basically bribe her and won’t leave her alone, so Brandy concedes with the caveat that if weird stuff starts happening like last time, she’s out. Will their trip be conventional scary fun or is there something more sinister at work?

I loved the first film despite its flaws because it captured the Halloween spirit, had lovable if a bit annoying characters, and included a discussion on people’s obsession for more and more disturbing haunts in the form of interviews with scare actors and documentary style clips. The cast is back, but the discussion aspect is gone with the entire film being found footage. It’s a lesser rehash of the first film where they go to haunts across the country and weird stuff starts happening. The actual haunts are real and awesome including a huge zombie 5k and a zombie themed escape room among others. That’s the only good thing about the whole movie. The raise in production value does nothing for the film except remove the charm and make it seem more like a conventional film.

The characters aren’t as fun this time around except Brandy. She is traumatized from the events of the last film and doesn’t want to go on this trip at all. Her “friends” don’t care and only want to cash in on her more considerable fame. The ending of the film shows they were lying to her and exploiting her even more severely than on the surface without care for her wellbeing. They figured the bigger payout would be worth the damage which it obviously isn’t to her. The guys are scum and I only took away that these guys are even bigger idiots than they were in the first movie plus having the capacity to be cruel to the woman they previously seemed to care about. I’m disappointed in this movie and all its male characters.

My rating: 2/5 fishmuffins

* Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Meyers

The day before a Halloween 1998, Michael Myers awakens from his coma after ten years to pursue his niece, Jamie, who is cared for by a foster family in Haddonfield. A scarred Dr. Loomis returns to save the girl and subdue Michael once and for all.

The fourth installment of the Halloween series follows the slasher formula well and looks especially amazing next to the convoluted mess of Season of the Witch. Jamie, played by Danielle Harris, is bullied mercilessly at school as its common knowledge that her uncle is Michael Myers. Her family doesn’t do much to help and she has strange dreams of Michael even though she doesn’t know it’s him. Her foster sister Rachel is kind of awful and horrible at a babysitting. She’s a typical teenage girl who would rather be on a date, but she loses track of Jamie when she finds out her scumbag boyfriend was cheating on her. Afterwards, she makes up for it by fighting Michael and trying to protect Jamie the rest of the film.

The biggest difference between this and the first couple movies is the formation of a lynch mob. Before, people thought Laurie screaming for help was a joke and refused to even open their doors. This new Haddonfield rises up and goes after Michael, which was refreshing. The ending is tragic, but not unexpected considering her choice of costume. The film ends as the series began. The only drawback is the new mask. It looks like a cheap imitation of the old one. I’m interested to see what The Curse of Michael Myers will bring. The Return of Michael Myers has a few tricks up its sleeve, but stays firmly in slasher movie tropes.

My rating: 3.5/5 fishmuffins

Halloween Mini-Reviews Classic Edition: Dracula (1931) and The Phantom of the Opera (1943)

* Dracula

Renfield goes to Transylvania as a financial advisor and leaves it in the thrall of Count Dracula, a bloodthirsty vampire. Together, they move to London so Dracula has access to a fresh crop of victims. As the first horror talkie, the film has large swathes of silence that give the film suspense and tension helped along with the deliberate closeups. Bela Lugosi plays both the charming socialite Dracula pretends to be and the powerful, inhuman creature he actually is. This is the first movie to portray vampires as seductive and show them as blending into human society. Lugosi uses his skill as a silent movie actor to make his body language effective. His mesmerizing eyes hold the camera's gaze with a small strip of light over them to show his mental power over people. His hands and movements are almost otherworldly.

Instead of Jonathan, Renfield is the person who takes us through the story and has the most pathos. His physical and emotional change from before being under Dracula's thrall and after is stark. Before, he's a professional, neat, confident financial advisor. Afterwards, his hair is in disarray. His eyes bulge crazily and he bares his teeth in an insane smile. He alternates between being completely devoted to Dracula and struggling to help Dr. Van Helsing and his daughter. Jonathan Harker in contrast is an oblivious idiot who has an overinflated sense of importance. I don't sympathize with him at all. The only problems with the film are in Dracula's nature and censorship. Dracula isn't conflicted or anything which makes him a much flatter character than all the other Universal monsters. Because of the Hayes Code, showing any sort of vampire attack and Dracula's death was banned. It unfortunately takes a lot away from the sense of danger and the impact of the ending.

My rating: 4/5 fishmuffins

* The Phantom of the Opera (1943)

Erique Claudine is fired from the Paris Opera orchestra due to the deadened nature of the fingers in his left hand. While the Opera paid well, he spent his savings on voice lessons for Christine Dubois, a talented but overlooked singer. When he thinks his music is stolen, he kills the offending man and has acid thrown in his face. Erique's madness has claimed him as he terrorizes the Paris Opera, making demands and doling out fatal consequences for noncompliance.

This version of The Phantom of the Opera is my personal cinematic favorite because of the humor, the lush sets, and the extended opera scenes. These things are largely seen as ruining the horror, but it's an odd story that is never adapted faithfully. This film fits in well with the Universal formula with its sympathetic villain. Erique Claudine can't catch a break. His life is falling apart due to failing health with his piano concerto being his last effort to keep out of poverty. There is injustice in someone stealing his music, but murder is where the sympathy stops. He lives under the opera house, stealing things so he can help Christine and intimidate the managers and the police. The actual music he creates is beautiful, believable as a folk song and lullaby, and the only original music performed in the movie.

Christine, on the other was hand, works hard at her craft and courts Anatole, a leading baritone in the opera, and Raoul, a policeman. Stuck in the chorus line, she aspires to star in the opera and acts as understudy for Carlotta. Both men comically snipe at each other while they garner her affection. This was probably done to fill the void of the Phantom, Raoul, Christine love triangle that wasn't done here because of the Phantom's age and his more paternal affection towards her. The opera takes on a different type of drama when Carlotta is first poisoned and then killed. The police respond by not complying with the Phantom's demands to bait him into caputre, but instead he responds with a large scale attack. The offstage drama and high stakes contrast with the beautiful operatic moments. The composer takes familiar themes from Tchaikovsky and Chopin and creates original opera music and scenes.

The Phantom of the Opera is light on horror and heavy on personal drama, but it captures the grandeur and scale of the opera with amazing music and performances. The comedic elements are well placed. The love triangle ends satisfyingly with Christine chosing her career and the adoration of the public over the affection of the either man. It's a well made film that will always be my favorite of the Universal horror films.

My rating: 5/5 fishmuffins

Horror Movie Mini-Reviews: Life and Cabin Fever (2016)

* Life

The International Space Station is home to 6 astronauts from all over the world. A probe returns from Mars and is narrowly caught flying through space. Exobiologist Hugh Derry sifts through all of the samples and finds the first instance of extraterrestrial life, named Calvin by an adorable elementary school class on Earth. Calvin rapidly grows and turns sinister when it views the crew as a threat to its existence. I thought life would be a complete Alien rip-off, so I was pleasantly surprised when it was quite different and the characters weren't all complete morons as they usually are in this genre (looking at you, Prometheus). Each of the characters has something to humanize them to the audience so we care when they start dying. Sho's child was just born. Hugh shares his feelings about his paralysis and why he wanted to be an astronaut. Rory is the loveable jokester while David is much more serious and obviously more at home in space than on Earth. Ekaterina and Miranda are the type of women I like seeing in these movies. They are no-nonsense people who don't let their emotions get in the way. Both do everything they have to in order to keep others safe. All of them are intelligent people who do everything from following set protocols to even sacrificing their own lives in order to save others.

The alien in the film is unique in that all of its cells act as muscle, brain, and nervous system. It starts out as a single cell and quickly develops into a large multicelled organism similar to a flower mixed with a jellyfish. It turns violent when it lies dormant, possibly dead, in a lab accident and Hugh shocks it to revive it. Perceiving it as an attack, Calvin lashes out and crushes his hand. From there, it's a cat and mouse game to either trap Calvin, suffocate him, or keep him out of the space station. The creature swims through zero-gravity with deadly grace. Blood in this atmosphere looks pretty awesome and is used with restraint. I didn't like that as the creature grew bigger, the front and back are defined and it has a sort of face. There's no reason for that at all, especially when it was symmetrical on all sides up until then. I'm also curious as to how it would fare in Earth-like gravity. The moments of romance between Miranda and David were completely unnecessary and out of character for Miranda. That was at least 10 minutes that could have been used to figure out the problem threatening their lives. Other than that, Life is a textbook sci-fi horror creature feature that ends up being enjoyable but forgettable.

My rating: 3/5 fishmuffins

* Cabin Fever (2016)

Awful teens go to party in a remote cabin, pissing off the locals and inadvertantly spreading a flesheating virus. This is the remake of Eli Roth's 2002 debut film that I enjoyed for all its cheesiness. This version is borderline unwatchable and I'm very confused about some of the choices made. First, the teens are the worst and make the dumbest decisions ever. Bert is the most horrible with his "barely legal" gun that he shoots to stroke his ego even though he accidentally discharges it next to people multiple times. If only he had just shot himself. That gun causes so much trouble. He shoots the drifter infected with the virus. When that drifter goes into their car, Bert succeeds in shooting the car a bunch of times, causing it to break down and cutting off their only mode of escape. The others aren't much better.

In the original, the teens are kind of awful, but they had distinctive personalities plus Paul and Karen were the two to root for. In this one, they may as well be interchangeable. Bert is only distinctive because of his stupidity. Jeff was hilarious in the original with his obsession with drinking beer instead of water and staying away from everyone else. His death was funny because he worked so hard to stay uninfected. New Bert was infected early on and ruined the humor. The Deputy is an attractive woman using similar humor as the last, but the delivery was terrible, making her character boring. The only part I liked of the new movie was the extended view of the locals. When looking for help, they stumble upon a woman butchering a pig, ranting crazily. She actually turns out to be helpful, but also serves them glasses she covered in pig blood. The pig blood gets in her hair, on her face, on her shirt as she obliviously touches things with her bloody hands. It's the only moment of real humor in the whole movie. Everything else is tired cliches, horrible decision making, and paper thin characters. The Cabin Fever remake is a carbon copy of the original with nothing to add. The comparison only makes the remake look even worse than the cult classic that I thoroughly enjoy.

My rating: 1/5 fishmuffins

Horror Movie Mini-Reviews: They're Watching and Phantasm

* They're Watching

A show very much like House Hunters International follows a couple choosing a house to buy in a rural part of Moldova. It seems odd at the outset for a couple of reasons. First, the couple is an odd pair. Becky is always happy and sees the silver lining in everything. She has simple tastes and loves creating pottery. Her boyfriend Goran is a famous soccer player and always angry or moody. He looks like a typical rich douche with his sunglasses, leather jackets, and monochromatic clothes. They barely interact and don't seem to share a lot of interests. The next strange thing is the house they decide to buy which is basically in ruins. If you've ever seen House Hunters, this part is hilarious because of how bad this house is. The interior hasn't been seen in about a hundred years and looks more like it should be demolished than renovated. The exterior is just as rough, but Becky is delighted at the possibilities.

The TV crew returns to the couple and their house six months later, expecting nothing to have been done. The crew consists of newbie Sarah, practically interchangeable Alex and Greg, and finally their abusive boss Kate. The only interesting character in the whole film is Vladimir, the realtor. He acts as the bridge to the locals and gets them out of a lot of trouble. Even though they are awful, trample on local customs, and anger the locals, he's there for them every step of the way with his friendly personality and affable nature. Sarah constantly talks over footage they try to film even though she went to film school. They find Becky has shockingly turned her ruin into a cozy home, but other things mar their filming. The local people seem more and more menacing as time goes on, eventually surrounding the house and destroying their vehicle. The ending had some definite flaws, but its unpredictable nature and humor makes me overlook the bad. It's definitely worth your time and fun spin on the found footage genre through the lens of a reality show.

My rating: 3.5/5

* Phantasm

After his parents' died, Jody takes care of his little brother Mike in a small Oregon town that is reeling from a rash of unexplained deaths. Mike suspects that the local moritician he dubs the Tall Man has something to do with these murders. This film is about two young men trying to make sense of death. In this story, death is a mortician alien who steals bodies to turn into servants for another world. These two boys along with another friend are the only people aware of this threat and work together to stop him. The Tall Man portrayed by Angus Scrimm is a memorable character. The tools he uses and the way he operates are unique to this series of films like the dangerous silver spheres. I didn't expect this film to be about aliens at all, but it's integrated well into solid horror territory. I can see why many people love this film.

While I enjoyed the film, Phantasm is much more relatable for men and boys. Women in the film are not fleshed out characters and feel completely separate from the three main characters. Beautiful women are objects of lust or damsels in distress to be saved for the main characters. The femme fatale minion of the Tall Man (who I think is really him in another form) is a flat villain who barely speaks and uses her body to kill men. A fortune teller's granddaughter (who doesn't even have a name!!!) acts as Mike's supernatural aide and tells him "don't fear," which carries him throughout the film. This is truly a film for men where women are treated as wholly different and outside of their world. Phantasm has interesting concepts and a memorable villain, but the isolated view of the film puts me off.

My rating: 3/5 fishmuffins